Anonymous

Anonymous asked:

If you could tickle one of your friends without them resisting, who would it be and why?

Ethan, because he’s ticklish fuckin everywhere. It’s so adorable, but he always gets pissy and emotional.

This is why I love my friends. Ethan, you’re perf.

Molly&Sabrina Have A Lesbaby: The Result
Ian: What the hell is going on in there?

Sabrina: Ian, everything is fine. The patient is just resting.

Ian: It doesn’t sound like she’s resting.

Sabrina: That’s not Molly, that’s our new arrival. He’s got a lot of energy since his last feeding.

Ian: Molly “Fed” the baby? Gross.

Sabrina: Actually, Ethan was kind enough to donate some blood. You know what they say, it takes a village.

Ian: How’d you get him to agree to that?

Sabrina: It’s amazing what Ethan will do if you promise him Swiss Roles and Yaoi.

Ian: But he hates needles.

Sabrina: No needles. It turns out that if you just expose some bare skin, the little guy just digs right in. It’s like a miracle to see nature at work.

Ethan: I Feel Dizzy!

Ian: Umm… Is he going to be okay?

Sabrina: Our kid drank half a gallon in one go, isn’t that cool? I think he’s going to be a Linebacker, or a Vampire, or a Vampire Linebacker. That would be crazy.

Ethan: Ooooooh!

Sabrina: Anyway. Blood is pretty important, so Ethan is bound to have some side effects like dizziness, or nausea, or sensitivity to light.

Ethan: I think I am going to stop standing up now.

Sabrina: Or passing out.

Ethan: Ian, if I die, I want you to have my Yaoi.

Ian: How can Molly sleep with all that racket?

Sabrina: Sleeping? She’s not sleeping. She’s in a coma.

Ian: Alright that’s it, get out of the way Sabrina. I’ll take care of this.

Ethan: I can’t feel my torso.

Sabrina: I don’t think so. A new born is very susceptible to infection and sickness, and cuddling. I only want to expose him to as many people as possible.

Ian: Relax, I’m not going to give him a cold. I’m just going to step on his neck and shoot him in the head, because that’s how I roll.

Sabrina: Well now you’re definitely not coming in. And I think we’re gonna send back your shower gifts too.

Ethan: I’m still laying here. Why won’t anyone help me?

Ian: I’ll tell you what. I promise to wash my hands before destroying the abomination of nature. Okay?

Sabrina: Nope, sorry.

Ian: Sabrina, seriously, you cannot stop me from going in there.

Sabrina: Oh yeah? Ethan, if you would.

Ethan: MORTAL KOMBAT!!!

Ian: Well, fuck me.

Anonymous

Anonymous asked:

Do you have shipping charts for any of your real life friends? And if so, could you please share them with us?

Ethan x Brad (in homestuck terms, I’m sure they’d be blackrom and I’d be the auspistice.)
Molly x Amanda (redrom all the way)
Kahlan x Noah (they’d most likely be redrom, but there’s always the complicated fact that Noah might still be in love with me)
Emily x Sean (they’d be the cutest couple. Like, nepeta and tavros cute.)
Lizzy x Aknife ;D
And the biggest, best ship…
Grant and I >:]

Anonymous

Anonymous asked:

You like goatsie?

No no.
And it’s GOATSE.
I was just like.
Confused and shit.
I was like w hat the fuck is on my dash
So I reblogged it to equally disturb my followers, whom I dearly love.

50 Shades of Me. Go for it.

  • 1. What is your best friends name? Grant Robles <3

  • 2. What color underwear/boxers wearing now? Pink

  • 3. What are you listening to right now? "Straight To VIdeo" by Mindless Self Indulgence

  • 4. Whats your favorite number? 69 c;

  • 5. What was the last thing you ate? your mother's pussy. LOLNO. Leftover turkey samiches.

  • 6. If you were a crayon what color would you be? they haven't invented a crayon in my color yet

  • 7. How is the weather right now? Rainy

  • 8. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? my dad ew

  • 9. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex? their faces bc pretty boys ugh <3

  • 10. Do you have a significant other? N O P E

  • 11. Favorite TV show? Glee

  • 12. Siblings? 5 half brothers

  • 13. Height? 5 feet

  • 14. Hair color? currently purple, normally brown. I think. It's been so long since I was natural lol.

  • 15. Eye Color? Brown

  • 16. Do you wear contacts? No, but I do wear glasses.

  • 17. Favorite Holiday? Twelfth Perigree. get on my level.

  • 18. Month? it's november...shit bitch u ratchet

  • 19. Have you ever cried for no reason? awl da tiem tho

  • 20. What was the last movie you watched? American Pie:

    Band Camp

  • 21. Favorite Day of the Year? who the fuck has a favorite day

  • 22. Are you too shy to ask someone out? face to face yeah

  • 23. Can you do a headstand (not using the wall)? lolNOPE

  • 24. Hugs or Kisses? kisses

  • 25. Chocolate or Vanilla? chocolate

  • 26. Do you want your friends to respond to this? i don't give a shit

  • 27. Who is most likely to respond to a text from you? granty nopanties

  • 28. Who is least likely to respond to a text from you? LOL zeke that assjacket ex that hates me <69

  • 29. What books are you reading? it's a webcomic. homestuck.

  • 30. Piercings? lip and well gauged ears ;3; hopefully more soon <3

  • 31. Favorite movies? 21 jump street, all american pie movies

  • 32. Favorite football Team? fuck yo sports homie

  • 33. What are you doing right now? your mother. no no tumblrlolol.

  • 34. Butter, Plain or Salted popcorn? i don't like popcorn

  • 37. Dogs or cats? cats i guess. pussy is power.

  • 38. Favorite flower? bleeding heart

  • 39. Been caught doing something you weren't supposed to do? LOL yes

  • 40. Do you have a best friend of the opposite sex? he is my best friend of all time and i love him ok shhh

  • 41. Have you ever loved someone? lol yeah no shit

  • 42. Who would you like to see right now? Jason...

  • 43. Are you still friends with people from kindergarten? Nope not really

  • 44. Have you ever fired a gun? bb gun xD

  • 45. Do you like to travel by plane? plenty of times

  • 46. Right-handed or Left-handed? right handed

  • 47. How many pillows do you sleep with? at least 3

  • 48. Are you missing someone? yeah...

  • 49. Do you have a tattoo? no but when I'm older i want one :

    3

  • 50. Anybody on Tumblr that you'd go on a date with? most of the guys i follow, unf.

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